Internet dating veterans love online dating for a number of reasons not the least of which is the sheer number of singles on dating sites. That first face to face though can be a bit nerve wracking. But being the experienced dater that you are, you know how to put a brave face on. So what do you do if your date is not quite so savvy?
The thing about someone being overly nervous is that it gets in the way of communication. Since a first date is all about getting to better know someone, it stands to reason that those nerves may put a damper on that. Your date may very well be excited about finally meeting you, but it’s obvious that he or she is finding the whole thing just a tad overwhelming.
The best way to approach this is in a caring and sympathetic manner. Try acknowledging that you sense they’re nervousness and admit that you feel the same. Even if you don’t, this little white lie can work wonders in putting your date at ease. Follow this up with the suggestion that you put these nervous feelings aside and concentrate on having fun. Suggest that you both lighten up a bit, and then change the conversation to something lighthearted.
Hopefully, you date follow and you can really get somewhere. If your date doesn’t follow suit? Well, there’s only so much you can do. You’re out there for a good time, not a free therapy session. If quiet clam-boy won’t open his shell, don’t be rudebut do find an excuse to make it an early night. Maybe this is just how he always is or maybe he needs to ease into things and will be better next time the two of you hang out.
Great, you both have your nerves under control and you’re actually talking like normal people. Unfortunately an hour into your date you’ve come to the conclusion that this guy or gal is not just a bit of a jerk, oh no, he or she is a TOTAL jerk. What do you do now?
It’s all a bit mysterious. You know he works with animals and he’s told you lots of stories about his nieces and nephews who love him to pieces, but now that you’ve actually laid eyes on him and have seen the way he treats random strangers; yeah, he’s a jerk. While his emails were sweet and even charming, the way he’s snapping at the waitress and the guy who accidentally bumped into his chair are downright embarrassing.
These are the kind of things you just can’t predict. His or her annoyance may not be directed towards you, but their behavior is enough to raise red flags. There is always the possibility that sooner or later their anger is going to be direct at you. There are definitely some deeper issues here that this person needs to resolve.
Now this may sound a bit callous but here’s the thing. Dating someone with anger issues is like going to the pet store and buying a puppy or a kitten knowing that it’s already sick. Sure, you can get a healthy one that may develop issues down the road, but at the very least you should shop around until you find the healthiest one possible.
This article was developed by the writers of the Datepad.com company where you can read thousands more professional .
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