We have been here before, haven’t we? Back at “square one” after another failed relationship. Surely we must be doing something wrong fundamentally or are we missing one of the main points when it comes to guys and dating?

You need to analyze guys and dating environments and see whether you have become stuck in a rut which is not being productive. This may be at the root of all your problems. Why not start afresh with a different type of dating destination and see if the environment can change everything?

Choose a sociable environment for your first date and certainly one where you can hear and be heard. You don’t want to be in a location where you have to shout to be heard and end up spending an evening exchanging throwaway lines. The conversations need to be meaningful so that you can both understand who you are.

Nightclubs are the worst places to meet guys, yet they are the first choice for the majority of people, it seems. You are almost certain to get off on a difficult foot here — how are you going to be able to decipher the guys and dating code when you have to compete with all those other visual and sensory distractions? Nightclubs are generally known as pickup joints and you should not try and change or reinvent the wheel.

Why not ask a good friend to look out for you and see if he or she can come up with a potential love interest? Your friend may also be able to setup a nice environment, a cocktail party for example and attach a number of single guys. Don’t opt for a blind date as this is definitely unnatural and difficult. Within your friend’s party , you will be able to engage in a normal conversation as the evening progresses and may be surprised how much more of a positive approach this represents. You could see the guys and dating arena becoming less conflicting.

Don’t judge a book by its cover and be ready to truly get to know someone before you make any assumptions. If you don’t take this approach, you can shoot yourself in the foot.

All of us come with a history and all of us carry baggage around, relative to previous experiences. This baggage can be really weighty when you’re trying to meet somebody new and you should be careful that you don’t allow all those ghosts from the past to spoil your future.

Be neutral, choose the best environment possible and you will have a great chance at making a long-term relationship with the next date. Understand that it takes a long time to get to know someone really well, but a couple of dates with this approach should really help you to see whether he is the right one for you, or not.

Writer Alan Bentley has a lot of material to help you understand guys and dating. A great resource can be found at at www.cracktheguycode.com.

categories: dating tips,dating,relationships,personal life