Have you ever considered that in order to save your marriage you may need to stop talking so much with your spouse? To many people not talking, fighting, and showing all the dramatic emotion goes against the grain of working things out, but for many it can make the difference between a vow renewal ceremony and divorce.
Most couples who are having difficulties turn to a therapist or counselor of some sort, seeking intervention to steer them through to happier times. While this does work for some people, others find themselves filling out divorce papers before they even finish their pre-paid sessions.
Are you wondering how you can end up one of the former, rather than the latter?
The difference is that the couples who are successful with talk therapy eventually realize that it’s not the talking that saves the marriage! It’s the process of really hearing what each person has to say and then taking deliberate actions in daily life to fix the problems that ultimately saves the marriage.
Talk that does not lead to action is not enough. Sessions that include two closed-off, bitter people sitting with arms crossed tight waiting for their chance to rip the other person apart or cry about how they have been hurt and betrayed will lead nowhere good. It can’t do any good because everyone is talking but no one is listening.
Another way to totally screw things up is to leave the talk session in a rage, screaming and yelling at one another. Or, you can completely shut one another out and refuse to talk at all. In either case, you aren’t like to move forward with positive action to fix the problems and all the fighting or ignoring will lead nowhere.
The key is to go away from a talk session really having heard what the other person said, valuing their opinions and feelings, and ready to take action to make things better. Most couples do not need to spend long lengths of time in a therapist’s office or screaming at one another at home. They just need one big honest heart-to-heart and a committed attitude to at least try something every single day afterward to make things better.
If you really want to save your marriage, then realize that action counts more than words. When it comes down to rekindling a flame or letting it snuff out, what you do counts much more than what you say.
Want to stop your divorce? Learn what you can do now! Click here and check out: or have a look at: and learn what you can do to get your spouse back forever!
