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Making The First Move

October 17, 2009 by Astrid Engels  
Posted in: dating

I read an article recently that talked about women asking men out. Men appeared to find it flattering and some even seemed to prefer it. Unfortunately, when I put words into practice I failed miserably.

I’m a liberated woman and I don’t buy into the whole “the man has to do the asking” thing. It’s outdated and silly. Be that as it may, I hadn’t yet actually asked a guy out. None of the men that had crossed my path to that point were inducement enough to give it a try.

And then one day, someone did. I had just started a temporary assignment at a law firm and was introduced to on the of Associate Attorneys. He was just gorgeous, very poised and self confident. Because this was a professional environment, I put him in a corner of mind reserved for “will think about later” and concentrated on getting the work done.

As the week went on however, I would see this gentleman noticing me. He didn’t just acknowledge me as another employee, but he seemed to be attracted to me. I noticed that he would make special trips down to where I was sitting. He would flirt with me without saying a word. I came to the conclusion that this gentleman was indeed interested in me.

I was thrilled, but I was not sure what to so. After realizing that our interest was mutual, I knew what I had to do. I would be only temping there a few more days, so the execution of my plan would be a breeze. My final day at the firm came. I carefully pulled the gentleman aside and invited him to lunch.

Was I ever surprised when he didn’t respond as I had expected. Instead of an unqualified “YES”, I got hesitation and then “I’ll get back to you”. One o’clock came and went without a word. He must have been tied up in a case, or so I reasoned.

Before I packed up for the day, I called his extension and left a voice mail message, including my number. A week later and I hadn’t heard from him. That was strike two and as far as I was concerned, this guy was out! I’d obviously read it all wrong, or maybe he was one of the few guys who preferred to do the asking.

Either way now I am a bit more skeptical about making the first move. Although the gentleman was not rude to me, not responding had the same effect. At that time in my life, I would have even preferred a lie such as “I’m sorry, but I’m seeing someone” or “I’m gay”.

I’m sure there are guys who like it when women ask them out. I suspect that my initiation just happened to take place with the wrong guy. I’ll do it again sometime, but when I do I’ll make doubly sure of his attraction to me!

This post was developed by the writers of the Datepad.com internet dating company where you can read thousands more helpful dating posts.


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